After a productive day completing fun sewing projects and cooking addictive cannelloni, I find myself unable to sleep, due to brooding over the insults I received during last night's foray into town, so I am going to have a little blurt about it to clear my head.
I was described as "enormous", "intimidating", "ugly", "smug", "offensive", and "disgusting", all in the course of a rather alarming rant issued forth by a capacious middle aged man, who happened to be sitting at an adjacent table of a cabaret club frequented by my mother and me.
I am certain that the man in question believed I was unable to hear him, especially since his dissertation concerning my overall appearance was rather vitriolic. His companion was a woman, remarkably similar in size and dress to myself, and she remained silent throughout. No doubt she had retreated to a happy place inside her imagination, whilst desperately fighting the urge to roll her eyes and/or slap the guy.
He punctuated each new adjective with a pointed index finger; thusly; "She's enormous! (finger). I mean, I played full forward in rugby and that girl is intimidating! (finger). Who does she think she is, to look so smug with her ugly face? (finger). It's not right! (finger). It's offensive the way these fat birds think they can just wear whatever they like. Unbelievable! She's just disgusting! (finger)."
On the whole, this was an embarrassing spectacle for all involved. I remained reticent, preferring to focus on enjoying a rare evening out with my mother, after a particularly horrible year for the both of us. Everybody could hear this turdburger, which makes me wonder if he a) has a hearing impediment, or b) has an undiagnosed mental illness. A kind man sitting next to me leaned over and said in a stage whisper; "Somebody is obviously very secure in their masculinity", then everybody had a giggle and breathed a sigh of relief as the house lights went down.
Anyhoo, end of rant. I feel better now.
No comments:
Post a Comment